Lately, my life has been changing at an odd, unexpected pace.
Entangled worries, moments of happiness, uncertainties…
But this time, I’m not in a dark spiral—
I’m standing in a glowing intersection.

In just a few days, I’ll be flying for the first time.
Yes—for the first time.
It might seem like a regular experience to most people,
But to me, it’s a huge step.
For the first time in my life, I’ll be that close to the sky.
I feel butterflies in my stomach; a bit of fear, but mostly excitement.

Yesterday and today, I took my university exams.
This year is coming to an end.
And if everything goes well…
I might actually have a profession.
That thought makes me happy.
It’s beautiful how even a small possibility can ignite such a big hope in me.

But of course, every bright chapter casts its own shadow.
The issue of compulsory military service is still unresolved.
However, I recently found out that I have an advanced herniated disc in my back.
It’s not just a physical problem—
It might also be the reason I’m not drafted into the military.
I can’t bend over.
Even meeting basic personal needs is difficult.
Yet within this pain, there’s a sense of relief—
The thought of not being forced to exist among many men brings me peace.

There’s also little time left before the Green Card results are announced.
Maybe this year, life will take an entirely different turn.
But now I know that the path to America begins with learning how to stand on my own feet in my own country.
I need to save money, grow my business, gain experience.
All of that will buy me time—
Time to make my spirit stronger.

And yes…
This will probably be the year when all ties with my family break completely.
If I succeed in my profession, that day will come.
And you know what? I’m ready.
I’m not afraid.
I don’t belong to anyone anymore.
I only owe myself.

So much is happening these days.
Each one opens a different emotional door.
But for the first time in a long while,
What burns inside me isn’t just a flicker of hope—
It’s a full flame.
And this time,
I’m ready to follow that fire.


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