🌫 Empty Mind, Heavy Heart

I once said I would share a blog every three days, but I can’t keep up with that. These days my mind feels completely empty, and I don’t know what to write. I don’t want to write just for the sake of it, but since I love expressing my feelings, I decided to write this anyway.

After a long time, I find myself truly thinking about nothing. Inside, there is only a deep sorrow. I lean against my window and watch the children playing in the park 👧🧒. The weight of the sadness I feel locks not only my lips but also my mind. My eyes burn from holding back tears 😢, and I feel the pain in my heart all the way through.

🕳 Losing Hope

The hope I once felt is nowhere to be found. Now I just complain to the walls I stare at in emptiness. I pity myself, but what’s the point?

I don’t even have the strength to keep up with blogging anymore. I don’t have words strong enough to explain the damage my hopelessness is doing to me. The joy of living I once felt has completely vanished. Whose fault is it? It’s too late to ask that question, and it’s meaningless anyway. What’s done is done, and I’ve already lived through so many bad things.


💭 The Struggle to Express

Now, I don’t even have the energy to explain my feelings. I live doing nothing at all. Maybe I’d have to be a poet ✒️ to make myself understood, because then you could finally grasp what I mean. This isn’t an insult to your ability to understand—it’s a self-criticism.

Even though I know exactly what my problems are, I don’t have any solutions for myself. I know that most of my blogs sound depressive, but I keep writing because I want to tell the truth. The day I’m truly happy 🌈, I will write happy blogs.


🌟 What I Really Want: To Succeed

I do want to say a few words about happiness… What I actually want is to succeed.

✨ To succeed at being free.
✨ To succeed at being a woman.
✨ To succeed at building and growing a company.

This list could go on for pages, but what we need to understand is: why do we want success?

“The world is not where it is today because people chased happiness—it’s because they chased success.”

If we can use phones today 📱, it’s not thanks to those who said “You can’t take money to the grave!” but because of those who said “I must succeed—for humanity and for myself.”

🕊 Freedom First

That’s how I plan, and that’s how I dream. Most of the things I long for today are actually things every human being should naturally have:

💫 Freedom of thought
💫 Freedom to live one’s choices
💫 Freedom to live safely
💫 A good job and a good home

But why do I have to work harder than others just to have these? Maybe that question doesn’t matter, but I can’t help asking myself anyway.