🌈 Is Being Transgender a Choice?

There is a widespread misconception that being transgender is a choice. The lack of respect for LGBT people in most parts of the world and the disregard for their stories pave the way for this and many other misconceptions. I will try to explain why this is wrong, using examples from my own story.

💭 What is a “Choice”?

First, we need to understand what the word “choice” means. “Choice” is a word that describes things we do that make us feel good, but are not mandatory.

Being transgender is the exact opposite because for a transgender person, the process of transitioning to their gender is not a “choice” but a “necessity.”

If they are denied treatment, they may experience severe psychological distress and lose their will to live.

What keeps them alive is the dream of achieving the body they belong to, and no one has the right to take that away from them.

Of course, during this process, they will struggle, feel sad, feel happy, and have to deal with various emotions, but at the end of this process, they will finally be free, so all this pain is worth it.



☆ My Process of Accepting That I Am Trans

Of course, I had significant experiences before I accepted that I am a trans person. Events I experienced at different times led to significant changes in my thoughts and preferences.

For example, the family I was born and raised in had conservative ideas and held bigoted beliefs that did not respect people like me, even believing we would burn in eternal hell.
Because I was born and raised in this environment, even though I didn’t want to, I believed in many wrong ideas for a while. I was an extremely bigoted, ignorant, and naive child who knew nothing about life.

Weeks, months, even years passed, and I slowly began to understand life. I realized too late how difficult it was and how helpless my life was. Of course, there was nothing I could do about it, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t try. I was trying my best, but everything was pointlessly pushing me into helplessness.

Throughout this process, with every step I took, my mind shifted to another point. I was over 18 when I could freely say in front of the mirror that I was a woman. Showing that courage was, of course, very difficult.

I still remember… I remember the day I bought my first skirt with my own money… 👗 It was late at night, and I had put on my skirt. I stared at myself in the mirror for minutes. Then I started pacing back and forth in my room. My heart was in turmoil because it hadn’t even been a year since my suicide attempt, and I was still living a helpless life—nothing had changed.

I can’t even guess how many times my thoughts changed until I was 18, but I remember like it was yesterday the times I suppressed my femininity because I was afraid to admit it to myself. In the end, I found myself waiting to die at the edge of a vast sea. 🌊


💔 Can All This Be Considered a Simple “Choice”?

Can all this be considered a simple “choice” in your opinion? Can people be so cruel and hypocritical?

It’s so easy for you to criticize because you haven’t lived it. Everything is so simple for you because you believe the same thing as the rest of the billions of people, so you’re surrounded by people just like you.

But what about me? What was my sin that I’m drowning in this holiness? I curse every day I live. I spew hatred with every breath I take because I am helpless.

I am a simple fish floundering on land 🐟, a simple ant walking on the road and being crushed by someone 🐜. I walk, but where to? Who will hold my hand? No one. 🤲


I hope you learn a bitter lesson in your life about what is necessity and what is choice. 🕊️