Category: SOUL PAGES
My hopes are usually here. My depressive memories, unfiltered comments. All of them are here. ⭐️
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Eid, Diets, and the Dream of Being Free
For about two months now I’ve been trying to lose weight, but as I mentioned in my previous blog post, I unfortunately failed and couldn’t manage it. Despite watching what I eat, I’m struggling not just to lose weight but even to maintain where I currently am. And on top of that, Eid is tomorrow.…
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500 Subscribers, One Quiet Victory
500. As of today, I’ve reached 500 subscribers. It’s already been well over a year since I published my first video. I never expected to be creating content for this long — I probably told myself I’d get bored within two months, but that’s not what happened. I’m still creating. I’m still writing on this…
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I Don’t Know What Tomorrow Holds. I Only Hope.
These days I don’t know what to do with myself. While wandering through the world I’ve built inside my own mind, I pretend to like people I don’t like in the real world. I’m deceiving myself because I’m suppressing my unhappiness and my hopes — as always. I think about the dreams I hope will…
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I Used to Pretend I Knew. I Don’t Anymore
I feel deeply embarrassed listening to people who think they know everything. We should think more carefully and act with far more humility about things we can never reach a definitive conclusion on. I encountered this problem constantly in my own family and life. My youth and childhood unfortunately passed under exactly this kind of…
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I’m truly alone now.
I mentioned to you that I had made a new friend. I think that friend is no longer in my life either. Every day, I understand more clearly how difficult it is to make friends. Having a friendship where you share similar values and mutually support each other under all circumstances is truly a luxury.…
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Why am I constantly depressed? I’m trying to learn English…
I’ve realized that my writings are quite depressive. It wouldn’t be wrong to say that many people see this as exaggerated, but I’m writing the truth. I write in whatever psychological state I’m in during the day — neither more nor less. I don’t write what should be, I write what is. Mine is not…
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I have a weak mind.
This is a heavy self-criticism, at least that’s what I planned when I started writing, because I don’t know how honestly I can speak to myself. I am not in a time when I should be criticizing myself; right now, without questioning whose fault it is, I should find a way to escape the life…
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I Don’t Want to Know the Future – That’s Why I Will Succeed.
Nothing I change on my blog, my YouTube channel, or my Instagram and TikTok pages ever truly gives me the feeling of “enough.” It always feels like there is some unreachable better point ahead of me, yet I’m not even sure if that point really exists.In the past year alone, I’ve made so many changes…
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Every Road Is Allowed Until You Win
I’ve started to feel like I’m fighting less lately, and the reason is simple. When I listen to success stories, I realize that many people have no ethical boundaries. For example, people trying to grow their YouTube channels once bought fake subscribers, actors unfairly took roles, women marketed themselves as objects, men acted like mafias,…
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I want to make money
I hear you saying, “Then work!” You’re right, I worked, but the results weren’t what I expected. Not only did I not get the reward for my labor, but instead of gaining freedom, I felt even more oppressed. The more I got to know people, the more I realized how difficult it is to live…
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Every person succeeds only through their own efforts.
Lately, I’ve been thinking about friendships and how tightly we bind ourselves to other people. Why do we have to go for coffee with someone? Why do we feel the need to have someone to tell our problems to? Why do we ask others to validate our ideas? Why? Don’t we know how to live…
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The truth really upsets me.
Job I feel extremely useless. I’ve been looking for a job for a long time. At first, I started with the mindset that “any job will do,” but the moment I began reading the working conditions, I fell into an even deeper depression. What’s being offered isn’t humane working conditions at all — it’s nothing…
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Grok, Elon musk, Hypocrisy, and the Price of Innovation
While scrolling through the X platform yesterday, I noticed a number of AI abuses that initially seemed somewhat amusing, but later I realized just how disturbing they actually were. An AI is freely circulating without restrictions, allowing other perverts to dress any woman you don’t know in a bikini and harass her. Precaution →? The…
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A Letter ChatGPT Wrote to Me”
I thought about what I went through in 2025—it was a tough year, full of pain, and yes, sometimes it was bad, but it was also a brave year. I don’t know how I survived, but here I am. I also wanted to hear it from the perspective of artificial intelligence. I asked ChatGPT a…
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You are the descendants of those who once sold land in paradise.
When you are subjected to bullying because you are trans, in moments like these it’s necessary to put the phone aside and step outside for a while. Take a short walk. Then you begin to see that these pathetic people do not have as much power over our lives as we think they do. I…
